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What a surreal couple of days...
May. 18th, 2004 10:13 pmEesh. Well, firstly (and most trivially), yesterday was probably the worst midterm I've ever taken. I did so poorly that I'm just hoping to get average. Please, please, let me get average! Or slightly under... That'd be okay, too. Honestly, I know I missed out on at least 25-30 points (out of 100) and the really sucky thing is, literally two seconds afer I turned in my test I figured out one problem in my head. Gaaaaaah!!! >___<
Secondly, both most important and most distressing, is a phone call I got from a good friend from back home this morning-- his mother passed away. Just like that. Here yesterday-- heck, here early this morning-- and then by 8:50 am (about the time he called me), gone. It's frightening when something like this happens so close to home-- it could just as easily have been my Mom or Dad (goodness knows, at 58, Dad's not getting any younger), or Brea or Kyle.. Or even me. Two minutes from after I post this I could be dead. That really makes me stop and think-- what am I here for? What am I doing? What should I be doing? Should I really be spending so much time and energy worrying and focusing on schoolwork? What else am I missing out on?
At the same time, all is not lost for my friend. Thankfully, his mother was Saved-- so, really, it's not so much a 'goodbye' as a 'see you later'. He knows he'll see her again. That's comfort that a *lot* of people this day and age don't have.
But this shock has brought to the forefront the fear I have for my parents... If they were to die tonight, would I see them again? I hope so...
Secondly, both most important and most distressing, is a phone call I got from a good friend from back home this morning-- his mother passed away. Just like that. Here yesterday-- heck, here early this morning-- and then by 8:50 am (about the time he called me), gone. It's frightening when something like this happens so close to home-- it could just as easily have been my Mom or Dad (goodness knows, at 58, Dad's not getting any younger), or Brea or Kyle.. Or even me. Two minutes from after I post this I could be dead. That really makes me stop and think-- what am I here for? What am I doing? What should I be doing? Should I really be spending so much time and energy worrying and focusing on schoolwork? What else am I missing out on?
At the same time, all is not lost for my friend. Thankfully, his mother was Saved-- so, really, it's not so much a 'goodbye' as a 'see you later'. He knows he'll see her again. That's comfort that a *lot* of people this day and age don't have.
But this shock has brought to the forefront the fear I have for my parents... If they were to die tonight, would I see them again? I hope so...
